Name: Will I Let Myself
Duration: P00H05M50S
Description: This is a track I wrote when my aunt and my mother were fighting. It's the age old question of should I apologize or not? I got the opening groove idea from a Carpenters song. I like how this track grows from a very basic opening to all that you hear here. I also use the melody of this track in the Bossa Nova section of "Superhuman"

Will I Let Myself

by Paul David

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about

This is a track I wrote when my aunt and my mother were fighting. It's the age old question of should I apologize or not? I got the opening groove idea from a Carpenters song. I like how this track grows from a very basic opening to all that you hear here. I also use the melody of this track in the Bossa Nova section of "Superhuman"

lyrics

It's 2:00 in the morning; I just can't sleep tonight
I've got a guilty conscience (I always do after we fight)
Did I tell you I'm sorry, right now I just don't recall
I probably didn't tell you I'm sorry; those words come hardest of all.

Chorus:
But when the dawn comes brining light and a brand new day, will the time come that I can finally say all the things I'm longing to tell you: I love you; I'm sorry; I care. Will I let myself, will I let myself. Do I dare?

My the time passes slowly when there is nothing you can do right now.
I'd like to pick up the phone and call you, but I don't think that's wise somehow.
I tell you: the guilt can drive you crazy (above all I should know). The fights always come: I'm stubborn and IF I'm wrong, I can't tell you so.

Chorus

Do I dare open up my soul to you? Do I dare show you my heart?
I'm afraid that you'll laugh at me and that laugh would tear me apart.

So I drink stale beer and much crackers with insomnia and the blues.
Praying you'll feel my message and understand what I can't say to you.
Here I sit in the twilight talking to God and not you. I'll get my act together tomorrow: swallow my pride: what have I got to lose?

Chorus

credits

released December 7, 2020
Words and music: Paul David Stanko

Paul David Stanko: Lead Vox & Percussion
John Heinen: BG Vox, cigarette
Camille Kolles: Keyboards
Mark Durkin: Bass
Adam Weins: Electric Guitar
Paul Backes: Acoustic Guitar

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about

Paul David Minneapolis, Minnesota

Paul David Stanko is an active percussionist, composer, arranger, recording artist, singer, drum instructor and performer around the Twin Cities. In addition to playing percussion with several local theater companies, Paul David has written for and performed with many local orchestras and churches. You can download more of Paul David’s music at www.SoundCloud.com/paul-david-stanko ... more

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